Living in Fear of Rule Fourteen

Rules of The Female Club (circa 1987) by Beck

1. The females always makes the rules.
2. The rules are subject to change at anytime without prior notification.
3. No male can possibly know all the rules.
4. If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5. The female is never wrong.
6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the male said or did wrong.
7. If rule #6 applies the male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The female can change her mind at any given time.
9. The male must never change his mind wihtout written consent from the female.
10. The female has the right to be happy or upset at any time.
11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. If the female has P.M.S. all rules are null and void.
14. Any attempt to document these rules could result in bodily harm to the male.