SubQuorum Science

BLAR.

I showed up for my 8 AM class this morning (actually, i showed up at 7:30, but that's besides the point) and welcomed... eight students. Eight! Out of a class of seventeen! What the what?!?!

So I already knew that the presentation we'd been working on all week was going to be derailed because 4 of the students told me they weren't going to make it. So I had struggled on the way here about what to teach today, given that it was ridiculous to do anything substantial because we'd just have to repeat it for the other students AND because we go on break after today so there's going to be a huge gap between this class and the next. So I settled on reviewing one of the questions from the exam* and then talking a bit about how to make rational arguments.

* - Basically, i am tired of people answering animal rights questions with "food chain" or "survival of the fittest." Those are descriptive terms, a "how" things happen and not a "should" things happen line of reasoning. True, you can meta-argue the whole thing (as I often do), that humans are entrenched in an implicitly non-ethical game, that of survival, and so ethical questions are on some level absurd. But that' not what's happening here; they are giving a relatively simplistic "that's just the way it is" style argument. Like "the way it is" somehow defines the "way it ought to be." Bollocks to that. Drives me nuts.

Interestingly, there are only 5 ways to respond to a truly rational argument. And by truly rational argument, I mean one of this variety:

All men are mortal.
Socrates is a man.
--------------------
Socrates is mortal.

The five ways to respond are:

1. Question the premises - check that an assertion like "Socrates is a man" is true.
2. Question the logic - check whether the individual steps actually follow one another.
3. Question the terms - do they mean what they think they mean (inconceivable, etc.)?
4. Grant that the argument is correct. Adjust your worldview accordingly.
5. Grant that the argument is correct, but "agree to disagree."

So I thought this would be cool, given that part of we're trying to accomplish in this class is learning to make succinct, rational arguemnts. But then I look up and see less than half of the students here. Argh. Frustration. So I talk briefly about the how/should distinction and then send them back to their rooms. Pointless day - why teach something you're only going to have to reteach two weeks from now? Plus the kids, spring break fever in the air, had one foot out the door anyways. Tres annoying.

Did I mention that Crappy Weather: The Wint Remix is playing outside? So yeah, I booked it here in the rain and the snow (I got the funk funky flow) to find that we didn't have a quorum. So I cancelled class; sue me. I have to stick around to tutor a student on the Ottoman Empire, so I'm now waiting. To talk about coffeehouses and homosexual man slaves who have social status and such. Concubines, harems (which according to the textbook are not actually sexual in nature, who knew? Another fantasy dashed) and the like. You know, stuff on which I am clearly an expert. If by expert you mean someone who "read the textbook in the bathtub yesterday."

Man, do I ever rule.

On the plus side, I got some work done during the cancelled clas and walked down the hall (HE WALKED ON DOWN THE HALL) to find fellow teacher Ellie showing Apocalypse Now. Sweet. I watched the ending sequence, from the Dennis Hopper's "The Hollow Men" quotes to the yak sacrifice to the Helicopters in the background... I love that film. I think i will watch the whole thing and write a review soon. Wahoo. I will also read Conrad's Heart of Darkness, just for completeness's sake.

I will not, however, be doing any of that tonight, because we are allegedly going out with GrinGoat and SaviorBump (Lamazz obligations not-withstanding). We are supposed to eat, drink and play games. It will be awesome. If we play poker (Christophe already did. Hey-O!), perhaps I will throw on The Doors tune "The End" just to set the tone and let the competitors know that the Nyet will slaughter you like a helpless yak in a way that would never make it past PETA-sensitive censors nowadays. Metaphorically, of course.



Another funny fact to end the post - one of my fellow Nut instructors, Gina, has a reputation as a hard grader. I am using her keyboard right now... and I notice that the F key is worn out. the rumors ring true.